If you had a time Machine, where would you put it?

Friday, December 2, 2005

I love my job. Here's a window into the world that is The Computer Lab.

I recieved this email from my coworker Kevin. I cut out the beginning...it just wasn't funny.

[begin email]

...while these shifts may have already taken place and were not covered, please feel free to use our Super-Dooper-SGA-Lab Time Travel Machine. It can be found over by the Office Supplies area. (home of the previously broken electric hole puncher, everlasting jammed stapler, and schreechingly loud paper cutter) It is located right to the left of the counter. You may look and see a simple paper shredder, but this is no ordinary paper shredder.

To use it, simply write the date and time of the shift you would like to cover on a plain white piece of paper, and insert accordingly. You will then appear in the lab ready to cover the desired shift, as long as it is still open. Please do not travel back to a time when the lab is closed, as you may find yourself locked in a dark room haunted by the evil spirits of our angriest of current and past lab customers.

For large group time travel, see the man in charge of our poster printer. It will cost you $2 per square foot of every person who wants to travel, and we round up to the next foot to ensure that no body parts are left out of the time travelex.

Please observe that you must insert one page at a time, in order to avoid catastrophic time machine travel failure. We've had other forms of failure here in the past (see: electric holepuncher failure) and that was able to be replaced. But since this new machine is recent technology, we cannot exactly gurantee that we can solve the problem. You will run the risk of half of yourself sent back to the desired time and date, and your other half will be left sitting here unable to walk out on your own because your legs are wandering off in Africa in the middle of the Sahara Desert looking for a bathroom to use.

If you have any further questions about our new Super Dooper Time Machine, see Kevin or Adam.

[end email]

Well, I thought it was cute.

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