Race Horses

Sunday, June 1, 2008

So I was watching the third episode of Heroes and just about 4o or so minutes into the program, you hear the end of a cut off conversation. The guy says "...and he says 'holy cow, a talking dog!'"

I don't know why I never looked up that joke online until now, but it turns out, there are a number of different versions but mine seems to be the only one that is quite so long.

One (irritating) variation is:

Two race horses have just been worked out on the practice track, and are being led back into the stable.

After the stable boy leads them into their stalls, the first race horse tells the second, "Hey, did you notice something odd about that guy? I don't know, he just doesn't seem right to me".

The second race horse responds, "No, he's just like all the other stable boys, and the grooms, and the trainers, and the jockeys – just another short, smelly guy with a bad attitude, 'Push, push, push, run harder…We don't care if you break down, just move it, eat this crap, and get back to your stall".

The first race horse says, "Yeah, I know what you mean! This game is just a big rat race, and I'm really tired of it."
A stable dog has been watching the two of them talk, and he can't contain himself.

"Fellas", he says. "I don't believe this! You guys are RACEHORSES. I don't care what they say about lions, YOU GUYS are the kings of the animal world! You get the best digs, you get the best food, you get the best health care, and when you run and win, you get roses and universal adulation. Even when you lose, people still think you're great and give you sugar cubes. And if you have a great career, you get put out to stud, and have an unimaginable blast better than anything Hugh Hefner ever imagined. Even if you're not in demand as a stud, you still get put out to pasture, which is a mighty fine way to spend your life, if you ask me. I mean, you guys just don't appreciate how good you have it!"

To which, the first race horse turns to the second race horse and says, "Would you look at this! A talking dog!"

Just thought ya'll would be interested to know...for any of those who understand what I'm talking about. For those who don't, trust me, you don't want to know so just don't ask.

5 shared their love:

Anonymous said...

Are you kidding? Of COURSE they want to know. However, it only works if YOU are the one telling it and YOU use all the gestures, etc. that go with it. By the way, that almost-a-joke thing you just printed was really BAD! Doesn't even come close.

Love, mom

Adam said...

your's is infinitely more .... hokey ;) At least the dog in this version has a good argument! haha

Jessica said...

I definitely agree with mom on this one! I would kill to hear the Nina racehorse story right now, I'd laugh so hard I damn near peed my pants :) P.S. I did notice that in Heroes too and it made me smile and think of you ;) Much love!!!

Anonymous said...

I agree with Jessica. When you come home, we're all going to get together and the highlight of the evening will be hearing you tell that story. You might want to practice on your English-speaking friends there. teehee


Anonymous said...

OK, I'm with mom and Jessica. I love your versions of jokes.

Love, Kim

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